The below is my reply to the Pissed off as a pissed off thing comments! Blogger is being a pain!!
This is Eeeek - hi peeps! have updated the rest of the story above. I have had enough and it is a shame. To be lied to, threatened and accused is enough. I can't afford to do the solicitor thing as I don't have the cash to pay one and wouldn't be entitled to legal aid. I would like to give up POA but don't know how to do it other than pay a solicitor.
I should have taken more notice of incomes and outcomes and what was being asked /used for. Despite a pension and rent finances were permanently at a deficit and no saving available. 1k per month from a yearly income of 12k doesn't work if you have to budget for landlords insurance, maintenance etc. If you don't you haemoragh money - simples now I see it.
Wednesday, 25 May 2011
Blatant Lies -hmm a solicitor who sends expensive letters without getting paid.....
Thanks for the comments peeps. After a vary threatening blatant lie I have called it quits.
In an email I was threatened with a ficticious solicitors letter sent without the request of a paying client all the way to south east asia..
The most annoying thing, apart from being so blind to basic maths and accusing me of squandering a massive sum of money!!! (a few k I could undertand but 40k is hysterical)is the blatant lie that Mums solicitor had been in touch by letter reminding her that he was legally able to audit any accounts for missapropriated funds.
Of course I have not seen this letter but even I know that a solicitor wouldn't do this unless someone was paying them. She thinks I am an idiot.
The lie and the solicitor''threat'' have been the last straw. I am actually waiting for the solicitor to call me back re this correspondence.have gone through books and am unable to account for approx 9k. I will be more thorough over the weekend and it will turn up. Hmmm Who pays the solicitor to send an expensive letter to south east Asia....... Blatant lies. More likely that the old fella was retiring and house deeds, wills etc were transferred to another law firm that's if there was any communication at all..... If I am wrong then I have a very conscientious solicitor who works for free.............. I cannot believe it still. Lies lies lies and I am supposed to be stupid enough to believe it and be scared by it - The point of a lie is to get someone to believe it -yes???
And then was told I was acting guiltily by not accounting for 40k!!!!!!!!!!!
I worked out a few sums - laid out opening balances, income and outcome over 4 tax years - roughly/approx and easily accounted for 40k+ - how it got there and how it was spent.... 1000 per month in care fees South East Asia style x 50 months = 50k!!!!!
I am sickened and completely finished. And it was blatantly a lie that it was all for my own good and satisfying legal responsibilities - it was more about clutching at straws and hoping for an inheritance.
In an email I was threatened with a ficticious solicitors letter sent without the request of a paying client all the way to south east asia..
The most annoying thing, apart from being so blind to basic maths and accusing me of squandering a massive sum of money!!! (a few k I could undertand but 40k is hysterical)is the blatant lie that Mums solicitor had been in touch by letter reminding her that he was legally able to audit any accounts for missapropriated funds.
Of course I have not seen this letter but even I know that a solicitor wouldn't do this unless someone was paying them. She thinks I am an idiot.
The lie and the solicitor''threat'' have been the last straw. I am actually waiting for the solicitor to call me back re this correspondence.have gone through books and am unable to account for approx 9k. I will be more thorough over the weekend and it will turn up. Hmmm Who pays the solicitor to send an expensive letter to south east Asia....... Blatant lies. More likely that the old fella was retiring and house deeds, wills etc were transferred to another law firm that's if there was any communication at all..... If I am wrong then I have a very conscientious solicitor who works for free.............. I cannot believe it still. Lies lies lies and I am supposed to be stupid enough to believe it and be scared by it - The point of a lie is to get someone to believe it -yes???
And then was told I was acting guiltily by not accounting for 40k!!!!!!!!!!!
I worked out a few sums - laid out opening balances, income and outcome over 4 tax years - roughly/approx and easily accounted for 40k+ - how it got there and how it was spent.... 1000 per month in care fees South East Asia style x 50 months = 50k!!!!!
I am sickened and completely finished. And it was blatantly a lie that it was all for my own good and satisfying legal responsibilities - it was more about clutching at straws and hoping for an inheritance.
Tuesday, 24 May 2011
As pissed off as a pissed off thing in a most pissed off thing competition!
Money, families- biggest bane of my life. I got lumbered with Power of attorney for my mum. This means I get the pleasure of her banking., Add in family to this mix and yes it was a time bomb. I knew this and wanted nothing to do with it but had no choice as I was the only party available to do it. I have no interest in money - I had enough with my own frugality and attempts to keep out of the financial mire thank you very much. My preference would have been completely different but like I said no choice. Anyway have basically been berated for my efforts at book keeping which yes were pants but I warned all those involved of Mums failing health and problems and I was left to deal with it on my own.
I have been accused of mislaying 40k. Family yet again!!! (Ha I wish - wouldn't be whinging about my 11yr old car or ridiculous mortgage payments if I had and would have had a few interesting holidays, a new kitchen, central heating lol lol)
My book keeping system is rubbish. However to avoid bank charges and get the best rate of exchange etc I would withdraw funds and hand over cash to the relevant member of the family or use my account to transfer money or pay directly into accounts. There is no paper trail. Why???... family. You don't bother with a paper trail.
I can account for the expenditure and know where it has gone. - house renovations in order to find tenants, cash sent to a number of accounts for parental upkeep to avoid bank charges..... I pay for things in cash if possible - cheaper- so that's a withdrawal made by me. receipts for house renovations from2007/8 are missing. I have moved twice, had three homes and had a baby since mum left in 2007. I worked full time from Weeny girl being 8 months old, had housework, washing, shopping and all the other domestic stuff to accomplish as well as buying a house, single parenting, moving twice with a baby in tow . The throw everything into a tin filing system has fallen down.
Ok my point. I have given a general rundown re cash and budgets on several occasions to interested parties but I am supposed to flagellate myself and worry myself to death over what I cannot change- my long past accounting system. Accordingly its for my own good and no one thinks I have borrowed the money surreptitiously!!. This is bollocks. Its about where is my money!!! (My gut instinct all along was to say get a financial adviser in to do some care fees planning to pay for mums care in this country then no one had to do this but such is life) Family being perfect and supreme beings have every item receipted and accounted for all monies they received listed, budgeted but then again its nice to have time for pilates and a book club and not to have to do domestics, small child care etc etc. If I had had the time there is so much I could of and would of done and not just keep orderly accounts and if I had had the ability... well that's another story. And being perfect never making mistakes well I should just try harder to be more like them.I have sent out copies of rent statements and emails re renovation work. I am sick of having to repeat myself,.
Upshot is I have had enough. Supposedly I am on facebook/blogging all the time and could have done more.... yeah and less pilates and book club and a trip home in 2006 might have changed everything..... Hindsight is a wonderful thing!
So am pondering ''need''... how much do I need to have this in my life and the answer is not at all. I have the joys of new job, house selling, ex s to deal with, my own finances to run, some relationship and personal stuff, weeny girl to raise, a garden to keep, friends and family to see. I have no time for this. To be spoken to like that, to be insulted, to be patronised. My self esteem is fragile and dependant on medication enough as it is.
I will complete the last few responsibilities re assessments for mum then I am passing over all documentation and washing my hands of it all. never ever again. Its late and I am unable to sleep . This point says it all and it is the final straw for me. what would really be the purpose of continuing this relationship I ask myself.... and I struggle to find an answer.
I really need to find my happy place again. How dare someone effect your life so much that you can't sleep and have a knot in your stomach.... ''but all I said I ......''can hear the echoes already and they are so familiar and even in apology the tone is so patronising..... Time Gentlemen please methinks.
I have been accused of mislaying 40k. Family yet again!!! (Ha I wish - wouldn't be whinging about my 11yr old car or ridiculous mortgage payments if I had and would have had a few interesting holidays, a new kitchen, central heating lol lol)
My book keeping system is rubbish. However to avoid bank charges and get the best rate of exchange etc I would withdraw funds and hand over cash to the relevant member of the family or use my account to transfer money or pay directly into accounts. There is no paper trail. Why???... family. You don't bother with a paper trail.
I can account for the expenditure and know where it has gone. - house renovations in order to find tenants, cash sent to a number of accounts for parental upkeep to avoid bank charges..... I pay for things in cash if possible - cheaper- so that's a withdrawal made by me. receipts for house renovations from2007/8 are missing. I have moved twice, had three homes and had a baby since mum left in 2007. I worked full time from Weeny girl being 8 months old, had housework, washing, shopping and all the other domestic stuff to accomplish as well as buying a house, single parenting, moving twice with a baby in tow . The throw everything into a tin filing system has fallen down.
Ok my point. I have given a general rundown re cash and budgets on several occasions to interested parties but I am supposed to flagellate myself and worry myself to death over what I cannot change- my long past accounting system. Accordingly its for my own good and no one thinks I have borrowed the money surreptitiously!!. This is bollocks. Its about where is my money!!! (My gut instinct all along was to say get a financial adviser in to do some care fees planning to pay for mums care in this country then no one had to do this but such is life) Family being perfect and supreme beings have every item receipted and accounted for all monies they received listed, budgeted but then again its nice to have time for pilates and a book club and not to have to do domestics, small child care etc etc. If I had had the time there is so much I could of and would of done and not just keep orderly accounts and if I had had the ability... well that's another story. And being perfect never making mistakes well I should just try harder to be more like them.I have sent out copies of rent statements and emails re renovation work. I am sick of having to repeat myself,.
Upshot is I have had enough. Supposedly I am on facebook/blogging all the time and could have done more.... yeah and less pilates and book club and a trip home in 2006 might have changed everything..... Hindsight is a wonderful thing!
So am pondering ''need''... how much do I need to have this in my life and the answer is not at all. I have the joys of new job, house selling, ex s to deal with, my own finances to run, some relationship and personal stuff, weeny girl to raise, a garden to keep, friends and family to see. I have no time for this. To be spoken to like that, to be insulted, to be patronised. My self esteem is fragile and dependant on medication enough as it is.
I will complete the last few responsibilities re assessments for mum then I am passing over all documentation and washing my hands of it all. never ever again. Its late and I am unable to sleep . This point says it all and it is the final straw for me. what would really be the purpose of continuing this relationship I ask myself.... and I struggle to find an answer.
I really need to find my happy place again. How dare someone effect your life so much that you can't sleep and have a knot in your stomach.... ''but all I said I ......''can hear the echoes already and they are so familiar and even in apology the tone is so patronising..... Time Gentlemen please methinks.
Monday, 23 May 2011
Weekend!
ha ha washout!!! Arrived in lovely sunshine - enjoyed one evening partaking of alcohol a wee bit in the family room - beer with child is a novelty!! It was empty and as such acceptable. As a child I had a lot of experience in these type of places - it was the 70's/80's and the holiday bar for families was not unfamiliar to me!!! By the morning I had a stomach bug and had s & d. Looked outside and in the driving rain Biggles had to change his back tyre which was flat. We had left Weeny girls waterproof so while he set off to find a kwik fit we went on a hunt for a waterproof!! No where - matalan, asda, sports direct, sainsburys - stocked a basic cheap kiddies water proof. She scored for an umbrella instead - princesses- sigh. We saw mum, met family for some food in Loans ( a village) - a compliment of thirteen of us - 6 adults and 7 kids - . I ordered food in Loans ( a village) - potato and leek soup was excellent as was the veggie pasta dish. I managed to only eat half the soup and a third of the pasta. Would go back there however. Biggles really enjoyed his - Chicken tempura and posh veggies. Prices good too 8.95 for two courses 10.95 for three. Food excellent for price. After that we headed back to the caravan. We had horizontal rain and I felt like rubbish still. Doctor Who and other crap tv - no more alcohol!!!
Sunday we had the wee party for the birthday girl. We had cake, sang happy birthday, pressies, tea etc - the kids were really good. Mum seemed to get something out of it- smiled and had a twinkle in her eye for a bit. we all had a general catch up to which was funny. Will be going back in July. Mum seems well cared for and the home is nice. My cousins call in regularly and keep the staff on their toes. They really care about mum which is lovely. As niece's they had a bettter relationship with her than I did as her daughter.
We made it to the Electric Brae which is an optical illusion - hill where your car will appear to be rolling up hill, Dunure and to the park.
On Monday we took the long route home in the hooligan winds through Moffat, St Mary's Loch, Selkirk and Kelso. Stopped by Grey Mares Tail waterfall for a stretch of the legs and the cafe at the Loch. Never seen the Loch so full. All the rivers were rather full. Gales a howling- reports of trees down and cars squished.
View from the caravan on the first evening - doesn't do it justice was pretty wow with sunlight like a spotlight - very heaven like through the clouds
Lucky mum got two cakes one from the staff and one from us and two lots of happy birthday sung to her which she responded to really well- residents got lots of cake that day!!!
Same sea from Easter Weekend - now grey and harsh with plenty surf!
Sunday we had the wee party for the birthday girl. We had cake, sang happy birthday, pressies, tea etc - the kids were really good. Mum seemed to get something out of it- smiled and had a twinkle in her eye for a bit. we all had a general catch up to which was funny. Will be going back in July. Mum seems well cared for and the home is nice. My cousins call in regularly and keep the staff on their toes. They really care about mum which is lovely. As niece's they had a bettter relationship with her than I did as her daughter.
We made it to the Electric Brae which is an optical illusion - hill where your car will appear to be rolling up hill, Dunure and to the park.
On Monday we took the long route home in the hooligan winds through Moffat, St Mary's Loch, Selkirk and Kelso. Stopped by Grey Mares Tail waterfall for a stretch of the legs and the cafe at the Loch. Never seen the Loch so full. All the rivers were rather full. Gales a howling- reports of trees down and cars squished.
View from the caravan on the first evening - doesn't do it justice was pretty wow with sunlight like a spotlight - very heaven like through the clouds
I often only ever get this view of them - will show you what I mean one day!!
Grey Mares Tail in the background
Guess what ........- no floors or bathroom cleaned and no grass cut. Well I never!!!!
Thursday, 19 May 2011
Last post till Monday
Off to Scots lander for three nights ! Weather forecast is poor but where are I going again??? Am I guaranteed blistering sunshine.. ever..... no - rain- most excellent Scottish weather!!! We have packed for all variables apart from snow!
I have packed this evening and am really tired. Friday - plans are just to get there and roll into bed. Saturday we need to find food and explore - Beach and Dunure and seeing mum. Sunday its birthday time - so cake, pressies etc. I shall purchase these on Sunday morning. I will post pics. May take a trip for lunch to Maybole - a village type place down the coast and a little inland.
See Mum again on Monday before coming home. ( I will gut the grass and wash the floors - I will I will)
Biggles stressed - frustrated at work and unable to ride bike. He is collecting weeny one tomorrow. We are leaving as soon as I get back.
Am shattered- and am really looking forward to a weekend where we have nothing planned and can potter about the house and if its a nice day go to the beach, if not bake cakes etc etc or may be all of that with extra bits!!!
Here are some weeny girl pics for fun!!! oh and Dunure and beer ice cream and the River Till at Etal, Northumberland over Easter weekend when we had lovely weather!!!
Brown Ale Ice Cream - no seconds thank you very much, I prefer cold bottles.
River Till - a tributary of the Tweed! ( I think lol)
Pretending to be a shop dummy - loving the wig!
Castle at Dunure - Scotland
My sister and Weeny one near castle making daisy chains
Its a great little cove with a pebble beach, ruined castle, caves, ice cream shop, rock pools and a nice pub
See you soon blogger peeps!!!
I have packed this evening and am really tired. Friday - plans are just to get there and roll into bed. Saturday we need to find food and explore - Beach and Dunure and seeing mum. Sunday its birthday time - so cake, pressies etc. I shall purchase these on Sunday morning. I will post pics. May take a trip for lunch to Maybole - a village type place down the coast and a little inland.
See Mum again on Monday before coming home. ( I will gut the grass and wash the floors - I will I will)
Biggles stressed - frustrated at work and unable to ride bike. He is collecting weeny one tomorrow. We are leaving as soon as I get back.
Am shattered- and am really looking forward to a weekend where we have nothing planned and can potter about the house and if its a nice day go to the beach, if not bake cakes etc etc or may be all of that with extra bits!!!
Here are some weeny girl pics for fun!!! oh and Dunure and beer ice cream and the River Till at Etal, Northumberland over Easter weekend when we had lovely weather!!!
See you soon blogger peeps!!!
Wednesday, 18 May 2011
Pics as promised and other bits
Well accomplished 80% of the personal admin - only got to pop cheque in the post and ring tax credits. In my defence only received the renewal form in the post when I got home this evening and had rung at lunchtime so all good intentions. Awating a call back from Home Front re the central heating.
No cleaning or grass cutting accomplished opted for the park at the bottom of the street and the girls from next door coming in for a play date!!! Much nicer!!!Must try harder and not look for excuses not to clean bathroom properly, wash kitchen floor and cut grass. Grass will wait till Monday when we return but re the other two jobs I have no excuse!!!
Major packing/organising tomorrow night. Biggles will collect weeny girl early and have her waiting for me at home with the car packed full of our stuff!
Super scrimpers - top tip IMO- cheapo screen wash!!!
Also apreciated the string over the paint pot - also very practical and the wet newspaper for painting windows - Ace!!!
Barbecue was a recycling dream - if you had the know how and the tools!
Pictures of finds and preloved donations from chums!! I have left out the washing basket - nothing exciting re that one!
Weeny one likes her tiger bin and star cushion. All rubbish gets directed to the tiger bin. Novelty eh!
I am still uploading to fb using wi fi on my mobile then down loading from facebook to my laptop.... when I get round to diving into the understairs cupboard I may retrieve the necessary cd software thing!!!
TTFN Peeps
No cleaning or grass cutting accomplished opted for the park at the bottom of the street and the girls from next door coming in for a play date!!! Much nicer!!!Must try harder and not look for excuses not to clean bathroom properly, wash kitchen floor and cut grass. Grass will wait till Monday when we return but re the other two jobs I have no excuse!!!
Major packing/organising tomorrow night. Biggles will collect weeny girl early and have her waiting for me at home with the car packed full of our stuff!
Super scrimpers - top tip IMO- cheapo screen wash!!!
Also apreciated the string over the paint pot - also very practical and the wet newspaper for painting windows - Ace!!!
Barbecue was a recycling dream - if you had the know how and the tools!
Pictures of finds and preloved donations from chums!! I have left out the washing basket - nothing exciting re that one!
Shame one got a bit blurred - it is a riot of colour and the pics don't do it justice. I like just being able to just sling it on at weekends and go out or potter about in it and its dead comfy!!!
Also scored for a hippie elephant wall hanging long thing but no pic. I love pre loved gifts!!!
Thank you dear Chum - many prayers and blessings and good karma to you. My chum needs it.
I found this funny!!!
I am still uploading to fb using wi fi on my mobile then down loading from facebook to my laptop.... when I get round to diving into the understairs cupboard I may retrieve the necessary cd software thing!!!
TTFN Peeps
Tuesday, 17 May 2011
Kind of productive - must try harder, can do better! Lucky Me!!!
Productive - kind of.. I suppose
OK so have accomplished the following:
Tax office - electricity company all as POA for mum - completed
Need to do more personal admin tomorrow - send off car mechanics check, ring warm front ( I have been given a grant for central heating - am happy with the electric night storage stuff I have but in an effort to sell the house have taken the plunge - booo - more bloody expense - two service charges to pay!!!!) Ring tax credits to confirm money made last year..... can't think of anything else - ah yes credit card to ring up and pay and doctors)
However I have gardened - planted runner beans and petunia type things in hanging baskets, hoovered up stairs.
Tomorrow - wash the kitchen floor, do the bathroomish, do some ironing ( Yaa Booo :-( ) Personal Admin at work- to organise/complete - make phone calls, etc etc
Scored for a few second hand things to day! A chum was having a clear our of stuff I had stored for her after she left her partner. Weeny girl got the remains of an art set - pens, pencils, paints etc in a tin briefcase style storage bag/box , a lion shaped flip top bin and a lilac star cushion. I bagged a washing basket - the ones you use to collect washing from the machine. I currently just plonk armfuls onf washing on the kitchen table leaving a trail of socks and knickers in my wake. And.a wicker shelf thing painted cream - good for the bedroom. Weeny girl happy, Mummy happy!
I promise I will post pics of finds, progress in the garden and such soon!!!!
Tea - one gammon round between 1.5 peeps, baked spuds one each - small one and medium size with cucumber, tomato salsa, mayo, mustard, sweetcorn and a few peas for splash of green colour. We really like this tea and both finish our plates pretty much. Dead cheap too. Gammon only 50p and the most expensive item on the list!
Mwaw Mwaw and all that May make low fat low cal (ish) Banana cake to take to the caravan- well its lower calorie banana cake .......
OK so have accomplished the following:
Tax office - electricity company all as POA for mum - completed
Need to do more personal admin tomorrow - send off car mechanics check, ring warm front ( I have been given a grant for central heating - am happy with the electric night storage stuff I have but in an effort to sell the house have taken the plunge - booo - more bloody expense - two service charges to pay!!!!) Ring tax credits to confirm money made last year..... can't think of anything else - ah yes credit card to ring up and pay and doctors)
However I have gardened - planted runner beans and petunia type things in hanging baskets, hoovered up stairs.
Tomorrow - wash the kitchen floor, do the bathroomish, do some ironing ( Yaa Booo :-( ) Personal Admin at work- to organise/complete - make phone calls, etc etc
Scored for a few second hand things to day! A chum was having a clear our of stuff I had stored for her after she left her partner. Weeny girl got the remains of an art set - pens, pencils, paints etc in a tin briefcase style storage bag/box , a lion shaped flip top bin and a lilac star cushion. I bagged a washing basket - the ones you use to collect washing from the machine. I currently just plonk armfuls onf washing on the kitchen table leaving a trail of socks and knickers in my wake. And.a wicker shelf thing painted cream - good for the bedroom. Weeny girl happy, Mummy happy!
I promise I will post pics of finds, progress in the garden and such soon!!!!
Tea - one gammon round between 1.5 peeps, baked spuds one each - small one and medium size with cucumber, tomato salsa, mayo, mustard, sweetcorn and a few peas for splash of green colour. We really like this tea and both finish our plates pretty much. Dead cheap too. Gammon only 50p and the most expensive item on the list!
Mwaw Mwaw and all that May make low fat low cal (ish) Banana cake to take to the caravan- well its lower calorie banana cake .......
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