Spent the day after swimming sorting through cupboards - we have the enviro clothes pile, the car boot pile and the eBay pile. I have also looked out gold to sell.
I have given Weeny's cot to a friend I could have sold it but it meant alot to me so I gave it to someone who would appreciate it.
I have £15 in survey vouchers put to one side. Hopefully these combined with the selling endeavours should cover Christmas for weeny girl. I shall not be purchasing anything other than for weeny for Christmas. I shall not be sending cards or presents to anyone. Tough boobies! Others should understand that there will be no coffers left over after moving and I will not do unnecessary debt.
Putting hopes and dreams to rest and its ok..... Not just the financial ones but the personal also. Clearing out stuff like cots today was not as bad as I thought it would be. Time is up for me. Weeny is my only focus now.
We looked out our ghosty stuff. Alnwick has some activities on over Halloween weekend - spooky bus rides on an old dreadnought bus around the town, t(he castle and town can be rather spooky), stories in Barter Books - a massive second hand book shop in the old disused station and a competition for best witch and wizard in the market square. We had a trial run to day with the outfits which inspired weeny to watch Shrek 3 ( has lots of witches in it) and Harry Potter 1. She wanted to sleep in her witch outfit.. ahhhhh bless. All the activities we are doing are free btw which is ace.
We had curry - homemade and left enough to freeze for mummy's lunch next week. The thermostat is showing 16.5 degrees,Heating is set for 15 which I think is a little high. Only when it drops below 13 degrees do I feel can I justify heating. Both of us manage fine with blankets and cardies at the moment.
We also harvested our paltry carrot crop - rubbish but fun to exhume!!
Biggles doing a 22 mile walk with some military buddies dressed as a woman, all for charity. He will spend the weekend very very inebriated. Been a bit distant from B recently. Am finding it difficult to see a future... maybe this will pass. I just do not see a time when we can be together or when I will have the funds to be able to visit him. He will be away for minimum of two years then who knows where. I need to make my debt a priority then look at ways to become more financially secure for weeny..... I don't see how 'we' him and I fit into each others life plan anymore long term. Sigh hopefully this will pass. Weeny adores him. She will miss him terribly when he goes to London and I really don't know how I would handle it with her if he was not going to be part of our lives anymore.
Not making decisions just struggling with 'us' at the moment, what that means given me being absolutely totally 100% broke for the foreseeable future. He knows something is up - I turned down the walk today( civvies allowed) and also have made excuses about him staying over when he normally would have. Needed some thinking time.
Que ser whatsits eh!